Nine Twelve Oh Eight

I took this photo in Dewey Beach, it's the Rehoboth Bay from behind the Bay Resort.

I could have gotten the lighting a lot better.. I wish I understood more about my camera's settings. Hopefully, when I get back down to Greensboro, I can sign up for a community photography course.

I'm so excited it's Friday. And the only reason is because my mom doesn't work on the weekend, which means that I won't be at the apartment all by myself! Pretty pathetic, but we actually have a lot to do this weekend! We have to pack everything up for the big move!!

Seven Years

Somewhere, in my box of photograph albums and stacks of pictures, there is a photo taken of me, dated May 11, 2001. I'm wearing jean shorts and an Ocean Pacific white shirt with a palm tree on the front. I am 14 years old, and my back is to the New York City skyline. The World Trade Center towers are prominent, and my mom, the photographer, made sure not to cut off the tops of them in the picture. Who would have guessed that exactly 4 months later, those towers would be reduced to rubble, and the New York City skyline would never be the same again.

Never forget...

Child Life Specialists

This morning when I woke up, my mom handed me the newspaper. There was a huge article in the Life section of the News Journal about Child Life Specialists!! The article focused on the staff at A.I. duPont Children's Hospital, which is located in Wilmington, and which is the hospital that Kelsey and I grew up going to if we needed a specialist, or if we had to run to the ER for a sports injury. (Think knee blow-out). A.I is also where Liam primarily treated, until he relapsed and the Kanes decided to take him to CHOP.

Here is the article: Helping Kids Cope With Serious Medical Problems

I know the woman who they interviewed - who is the head of the Child Life Department. She went to my church and she also had kids at my high school.

The article is really interesting...and if you'd like a better explanation of what I'm getting a degree for, then read it!

And we find a reason why, one step at a time.

Today I went to the pharmacy to get my prescription filled, and it was pretty busy, so instead of waiting around the store, I just told them I'd be back in an hour.  When I got out to my car, I didn't want to go back home and climb the three flights of stairs back up to the apartment.  (I'm not ashamed of my laziness.)  So, I turned on the car and drove to the first place that came to my mind - Liam's garden.  It's at our church, where his funeral was held and where his ashes are buried.  I haven't been there in probably a year.  I drove and parked, and walked into the garden, which is peaceful and enclosed by lots of large bushes and plants.  It's very pretty in that garden.  I sat down on a bench, and didn't notice the plaque on it.  I just happened to glance down, and I noticed that there was a dinosaur on the plaque.  I immediately jumped up and read it.  It read "In memory of Liam James Kane.  And all of the angels who bless this garden.  Love, Mommy, Daddy, and Alli."  There was even a dinosaur on it!  I was so excited.. I snapped this picture with my cell phone, which doesn't even do it justice.. but it made me so happy.

No other path, No other way...

No Day But Today.

So last week a friend of mine asked if I'd ever seen RENT before.  I hadn't ever seen it, but it's been one of my lifetime goals for at least six years.  Earlier in the year, when they announced that it was leaving Broadway, I did everything in my power to try to convince Em that we should drive to NY and see it, but we were never able to fit it into our schedule, plus the ticket prices skyrocketed.  Well, back in February my friend Courtney purchased two tickets to the 2nd to last day of the show, and she remembered that I had mentioned a few months ago that I'd never seen it.  So she invited me to go with her!!  The show was last night, and I didn't mention it on here until now because I didn't want to jinx anything!

IT WAS AMAZING!!  I am such a dork, and my eyes watered the whole time, because I mean, the story can be sad at times, but I was just so happy to be there, and I just couldn't believe that I was actually at the Nederlander Theatre seeing RENT!  It was such a fantastic show, and I was excited because the woman who played Joanne in the movie (Tracie Thoms) is playing her on Broadway now, and she was great!  I was able to (secretly!) record a video of Seasons of Love...there's no visual because I was trying to be extremely discreet, and I think the video is a shot of the ceiling in the dark (he he).  

This morning I left Rutgers (where Courtney goes to school, and where we took the train into the city from) and met up with Meg for lunch.  It was so great to spend a few hours with her, as I miss her so much!  After that, I stopped by the Galbraith House to say hello to Em's parents.  We sat outside on the deck and talked for about an hour and a half...it's always good to catch up with them.  Then I drove home.

I had a great weekend!  Thank you so much Courtney!  I always knew I would love RENT!

Mom at Work

Today I had a doctor's appointment at the hospital where my mom works, so I went into my appointment and afterwards I went down to the lab to visit.  I brought my camera with me, thinking I might be able to shoot my mom in her natural habitat ;-)

Here are some shots.  I honestly don't have the energy to go back and edit them right now, so these are just the images straight off of my camera.

My mom works in the Hematology lab, which literally translates to "the science of blood".  My mom and her co-workers are the ones who look at blood under microscopes and run it through machines to find out if we're sick or how our counts are.

The day consisted of a lot of my mom staring into microscopes and looking for white blood cells and red blood cells.  She showed me a lot of abnormal blood cells, which sometimes meant that person had an infection or virus.  

I like how all of the equipment in the lab is black and stainless steel.  

These tubes are called "Lavenders" and hold blood from patients in the ER or who are inpatient.  Once they're tested, they are put into this rack, to be put into a refrigerator and kept for 24 hours, just in case they are needed again.  Then they're discarded here:

The ones with a "STAT" sticker means that they need to be checked right away.  (Obviously).  Today, I helped my mom run a stat blood for a woman who was in labor upstairs, who was ready for her epidural!  I'd say that's pretty STAT!

I picked a good day to come in - because everyone in the lab had to get Fire Extinguisher Training!  My mom went first, and you can tell by her face how surprisingly loud the extinguisher is!  I even got to try - it was a little scary, but fun!

My mom gets A LOT of phone calls.  She is the supervisor of the lab, and when anyone has a question, she is the woman they get to talk to.  (click on the picture to make it bigger and see the look on my mom's face!)

They test a lot of different fluids in the lab.  Mostly, they test urine, semen, and blood.  However, every once in awhile they get Spinal Fluid as well!

These are the little things they use to put a drop of blood onto the slide.

Before we left today, my mom had lots of paperwork to fill out.  This isn't the greatest quality photo, but it shows what is a big part of her day - all of the paperwork at the end!

What a fun day!  I ended up staying with her until 5pm, and my mom let me wear a lab coat and gloves.  After I put my camera away, she let me help her run urinalyses (I successfully ran tests all by myself to find out that someone had too much bilirubin in their urine... which means that they're liver is not functioning as well as it should.)  I also delivered a lot of specimens to the blood bank, and to the Chemistry lab.  Oh, and I delivered a NASTY container of someone's diarrhea...yuck!  

All in all, a great day.

Max and Liam.

Liam has been on my mind a lot lately.  Perhaps it's due to the passing of beautiful Max Mikulak, who passed away Sunday night at age 7.  I've been reading the Mikulak's blog for quite some time now, as Max's father was one of the founders of the Magic Water Foundation.  Max's health has been deteriorating, however, I was stunned on Monday morning to read on his blog that he had passed.  What a sweet boy.  Oh, how I hate this cancer with every fiber in my body...

While I was moving all of my files over to my new computer from the old one, I found a lot of old documents that I hadn't looked at in years.  I found a letter to Liam that I wrote shortly after he died in 2005.  Hard to believe it will be 3 years since his passing this November.  Here is an excerpt from my letter: 

"At your viewing, your Daddy said to me, 'I bet Liam is staying up all night, watching all the scary movies we never let him watch, and eating all the popcorn he wants.'  I bet Daddy is right… You will always be with me, Liam.  I am sad because I will not ever see your smiling face again, or hold your hand, or sing you songs or play with you.  Or have piggy back ride races, or watch you hug your “baby sister Alli” goodnight.  But when I see the sun set, or see a baby smile, or hug your dinosaurs, I know that you are right there with me.  You’re sitting next to me on this bed right now, you’re flying around the room, you’re outside the window peeking in…you are all around me."

I'm a creeper, I admit it.

Okay, I know this sounds totally creepy, but this has been bothering me for months now.

Most of you probably aren't aware (unless you have one yourselves, or have heard me talk about it) of the capabilities of my stat counter on my blog.  This stat counter can do magical and amazing things!  Not only does it count how many hits my blog gets, it also tells me who is hitting it.  Well, it doesn't give me names, but it gives me the city/state of the person visiting my blog.  It also tells me if you found my blog through a search engine.  So, if you Goo.gle "One Safe Place", it tells me exactly what you typed into google to find my blog.

So, for example, if I see that I got a hit from someone in Cork, Ireland, then I know that it's Erin.  If I get a hit from someone in Philadelphia, PA then I know it's probably Lindsey.  If I get a hit from someone in Chestertown, MD then I know it's probably my cousin Meghan.

About a year ago, I started getting hits from someone in Virginia who was getting the link to my blog by searching Goo.gle for "Cop.per One Safe Place".  Obviously, this leads me to believe that it is someone from Camp Hoo.ver.  When I saw that, I was worried that anyone could search for Camp Hoo.ver and find my blog, so I went back and deleted every single "Cop.per" and "Camp Hoo.ver" out of all of my entries, so that no one could accidentally come across my blog (a camper, a parent, someone from council, etc.)  Now, I get hits from people in the same area searching "Kristen One Safe Place".

Please... I am dying to know who you are!!  I won't be mad if you're a camper!  I just want to know who you are, so that I know that I don't have some parent reading my blog or something.  Come out of the woodwork... Leave me a comment!  Or, if you don't feel comfortable leaving me a comment, my e-mail address is Knsmith5@uncg.edu .  I already have an idea of probably who it might be...so don't be embarrassed!!  

On that same note... I get about 100 hits on my blog every day from people who are regular readers.  I know that it's probably not the same people hitting "refresh" 20 times (haha).  Who are all of these people all across North Carolina who are reading?  I would love to know!!  I always wonder...is it people on my rugby team?  Is it people from my classes?  Let me know, I would LOVE to know if you're reading!!  I totally understand how some people wouldn't comment, maybe because they found my blog randomly, or because I don't know that they read it, but honestly - I write on this blog knowing that it is completely open to the public, so I would never be mad or upset to know that ANYONE is reading it!

9/2

I've been feeling very drained lately.  Not just physically, but emotionally and mentally as well.  I'm trying so hard right now, harder than I've ever tried before, to take care of myself in all of those aspects, and I truly believe that I am doing the best job that I can right now.  My mind is just constantly spinning...my thoughts are way ahead of my words most of the time.  I can't concentrate on anything at all, and I get very anxious over things that aren't worth getting that anxious over.  

This isn't a complaint, just a record of how I've been feeling lately.  

My mom's surgery is set for October 10th.  We liked the sound of that - 10/10.  We are moving out of the apartment on September 20th.  I'm already stressed thinking about how much work it's going to be packing things up and figuring it all out.  I'm really happy that my mom found a place that she wants to live that suits her so well.  I'm just kind of freaking out on the inside about so many different things.  

All I want is some stability and some normalcy.  Right now, nothing feels stable and nothing feels normal.

Ashland, VA

So this weekend was wonderful and relaxing, just as I expected.  After being stuck in some moderate traffic on the way (it really wasn't as bad as I thought it would be), I finally made it and it was so great to see Em.  We did some random things this weekend... went to Walmart, played Mini Golf (I kicked her butt!!), and just did a lot of driving and talking.  We also visited Kelly at Randolph Macon!  It was so good to see her and she showed us a little bit of her campus, and we did some shopping with her.  I love randomly getting to see friends!!  

This weekend only made Em and I stronger.  I am extremely happy that we decided to meet up, as we were able to talk a lot more about a lot of things we didn't get to talk about while I was in Greensboro, and we were able to further resolve some of the issues we've been having.  We also just had a lot of FUN!  We went out to eat at Chile's, watched a lot of TV, and Em worked on a little of her homework (doing drawings of me!).  

When I got back to my mom's apartment today, I sat down on the couch, closed my eyes, and sighed.  I miss Em already, but I am so happy that things are going so well that it kind of trumps the feelings of sadness from missing her and wishing I was with her.  

:-)