Sunday, November 22, 2009

Have you ever felt like you're drowning, but you're not anywhere near the water? I feel like there's no air here, nothing for me to breath in to effectively to get oxygen to my brain. I try to reach out and grab something, anything, to pull me back up but all that is solid just crumbles. Everything that's solid always disintegrates, that's how it's always been and how it will always be. Terror is beginning to take over my entire body, I can feel it in my fingers and toes. My body aches from treading, it begs me to just let go and drift. People around me are unstable, untrustworthy, un- everything else. My heart is panicking, racing so fast and something other than adrenaline is coursing through my veins. It's fear. And I don't know what to do.


Olivia said...

Many, many hugs to you. I am worried about you, Kristen. I'm here if you need anything.


Vickie said...

Start by breathing. Then read what's written on your sidebar. Here, I'll remind you:

"I fight with love and I laugh with rage. You've gotta live light enough to see the humor and long enough to see some change."

You'll make it. I promise.


gillian said...

I've definitely felt this way before Kristen.

The good thing is, in Delaware we have pretty good air for breathing.
And the better thing is that you'll be in Delaware pretty soon.

Lots of love