I hate to make a miserable post to this blog, but that is what I'm about to do. I will allow myself to feel sorry for myself for approximately the next 10 minutes.
My surgery is set for Wednesday, 11am. That's when I go under the knife. Or..the hammer/chisel. Or whatever they use to reconstruct a nose and septum. Lucky for me, all of my cousins were sick last week when I was visiting them, so now I have a sinus infection. Well, it hasn't been officially classified as a sinus infection, but when you blow your nose and everything that comes out is dark green, you know that something is infected. Thus, the pressure from the "infection" or "sickness" or whatever it is, is making my face feel like it's going to explode. Literally, just shatter into a million tiny pieces.
With my 9 minutes left of feeling sorry, I will make a list.
Reasons I Am Angry.
1. Although my professors are being very helpful, there will be points that I cannot make up for certain things in certain classes (pop quizzes, attendance, etc.) I have worked my ass off this semester, and I am angry that it's going to go down the drain.
2. Because I am getting surgery, this means that there's a chance I can't play rugby anymore. One nose surgery + playing rugby again + re-breaking my nose one more time = no insurance coverage on the next time it breaks. Plus.. 2 bad concussions within 18 months isn't a good thing. And everyone around me seems to be hinting that it's time to retire the sport that has actually helped to shape who I am today.
3. I want to be at home. I miss Em. When she dropped me off at the airport, I barely hugged her.. I thought we were going to be apart for 6 days, not for two and a half weeks. It's not that I can't live with out her (which.. I can't..) but it's just that I know she's at home with Sydney and my spot on the couch is empty, and I'd do anything to be at home with them. I know it's a lot to take care of everything by yourself, especially with Sydney being so weird lately.
4. I hate being sick. First of all, I hate being injured, but the next worst thing is being sick. And both at the same time? I can't even describe to you what the pressure in my head feels like. My nose feels like it's breaking every second. Not to mention, my sinuses are full of shit because they can't drain properly, I'm coughing and sneezing, which kills as well, and I'm just plain miserable. The entire day yesterday I sat in an easy chair, surrounded by my "supplies". My artillery consisted of: cough drops, nose spray, a sinus irrigation device, my pain medication, vicks vapor rub, a box of tissues, and chapstick. This is war.
5. My mom has two interesting neighbors. One is a woman who's husband constantly screams at her in some indistinguishable language. The other insists on listening to his music with the bass BLARING.. don't these people go to work during the day?
6. I am bored out of my freaking mind. I have played all of the Super Mario that I can handle, I have read two books in the last 4 days, and I've watched enough re-runs of Run's House and America's Next Top Model to last me for a lifetime.
Lucky for all of you, my ten minutes is up, and it's time to be happier, and remember that others are much worse off than I am right now. My teachers are being very helpful, a few of them are letting me write papers instead of take their exams, and all of them are working with me.
If you live in the DE/PA/MD/NJ area and feel like visiting, let me know. I'll be here until December 7th.
Love from Wilmy,